The permitance of Divorce.

We all are aware of how God feels about Divorce in a more general fashion as he said in His Holy and Authoritative Word: "I hate Divorce." (Malachi 2: 16). And I agree with that statement wholeheartedly divorce is an abominable thing especially if the reasons are unjustified to begin with. But does this statement account for everything that the scriptures have to say?  What if there are some particulars which actually give man the right to do such a thing? How should we think of those cases when they arise? Let us take note of a few of the more striking allowances in the whole of scriptures.

The get out clause 

What do I mean by this statement? Well, simply when a married partner (male or female) becomes a Christian and the marriage is not working because of different and conflicting principles come into affect. Then the unbelieving partner moreover than the believing one is given the freedom to walk away from that particular relationship; and the believing partner does not hold any kind of stigma due to it. 

Let us take note of the scripture which tells us this very truth:

But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? (1 Cor. 7:15-16)

While it may be true that they have tried for so long to keep the marriage together; there is simply no way for it last. For as I said, there are two very different and obviously conflicting set of principles at work which contribute to every aspect of life.  And it may well be that this is the most hassle free route to travel upon in order for that "peace" to be attained. That does not mean it the most desirable just simple the most realistic option. It is done in order to avoid many difficult issue from arising.  Let us note what John MacArthur has to say on this issue of where such an environment could lead:

Why? It doesn’t say that. When God wants to say you can’t remarry, He says it. Verse 11, “If she departs out of a Christian marriage, she must remain” – what? – “unmarried.” But here, “If the unbeliever departs, and he gets the divorce, a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases.” So, the marriage is ended. You see, desertion is like adultery in its effect. It disrupts the tie. Don’t fight it; let them go.   You say, “Why let them go?”  “Because God has called us to peace.” You know, one of the benefits of being a Christian is to have a peaceful life, the peace of God, the gracious life. And, you know, there’s nothing that God needs less than constant fighting, tension, frustration, and turmoil in a home. A fighting, angry, quarreling home is not God’s objective, nor, people, is marriage primarily a foundation for evangelism.

That is the one reason for divorce.  

The treatment clause 

Divorce can be permitted if one of the partners has volatile disposition; that is true, whether it is in reference to the Husband or the Wife. But it is more so, when it comes to how the husband treats his wife both in public and in private.  You know if a Pastor says that "divorce is not permitted even in this kind of situation" that they probably did not read the bible carefully enough to begin with. The rate for abused women in marriage is very high which shows that it is very that it is not a minor thing but a major one.  And it is something that the church should address more frequently because even the Saint still are prone to sin. Think about the words we previously saw:

And, you know, there’s nothing that God needs less than constant fighting, tension, frustration, and turmoil in a home. A fighting, angry, quarreling home is not God’s objective, nor, people, is marriage primarily a foundation for evangelism.

How true is that thought! The scriptures provide us with a positive basis which helps us understand right attitude for a believing husband to express towards his believing wife. Let us take note of this: 

Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching,

for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck. (Proverbs 1: 8-9)

Now it may not be an obvious thing to to discern due to the main point of teaching a child what he needs to do with regards to "honouring parents" even to the point of their guiding principles for living. But let me point out the issue: when the father points to the mother as a person to be respected and honoured by the child because whom she is to them; it must be understood that this is about having a example to follow. how should a son treat his mother is based on how he see his father treat his mother (how a husband treats his wife). That very truth will be displayed in his own marriage. 

Think about in this manner: why should the son listen to the father's instruction regarding his mother when his example does not abide by that principle? The Father, as the husband to his wife, should be demonstrating to His son what it is to be a loving Husband in his actions and in his communication. His wife is to be the most important person outside of Christ. In other words, the husband is not to be hypocrite in this regard: telling his son to treat his wife or his mother with respect and honour; and yet at the same time, he fails to live in light of that instruction. To put it in another form: a wife is to be the husband' joy.  Proverbs gives these two statements which are central: 

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones. (12: 4)

He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. (18:22)

Do you see the point? The wife is to be valued; even more than your own life. And to bring harm to her is simply unforgivable. Take note of the fact that in Proverbs 31: 10 she is compared to a jewel in that she is viewed as being worth more.  Let us end off with the words of Ephesians 5 which speak of how a husband to treat his wife:

In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, (vs. 28-29)

 The husband is to love his wife; but not only that, he is to "nourish and cherish" her too. Those words speak of care and provision. And eliminate being violent in any manner. However, if you do become violent with her than you are in violation of God's law and command. And there is a second reason for divorce. 

 

 The exception clause

The final reason for divorce being permitted happen to be one of the more serious points that God has laid down. And it seems to be more prevalent in the evangelical world today (and I use evangelical in a broad sense to include many different groups such aberrant ones); than one care to admit and that is issue of adultery. It has effected men and women from the charismatic world to the non-charismatic; but more particular the former-- for it is rife with such the most flagrant examples. But the scriptures are clear on the destructiveness of this particular sin. Let us note the following:

“You shall not commit adultery. (Exodus 20: 14)

This command hold such an important place in the Mosaic Law and the Law of God that it cannot be ignored. Not only is this act prohibited; but it is also guaranteed that one be punished for it. Am I simply making this up? No. Think about one of the clearest examples from the Old Testament; in the case of King David and Bathsheba (2 Samuel 11-12). David committed Adultery and to hide his transgression he committed other sins in the progress: coveting; lust; and murder. And as result in incurred death as a punishment but not his own. The one that God took to punish Him was his unborn child. And there are likely to be other biblical examples such as Abraham and Pharaoh (Genesis 20) where God causes the Pharaoh not to commit sin against him. 

Now in the Old Testament we have seen that in most cases that Adultery comes with a punishment. And often it is death such as the one mentioned above. But in the new testament in light of Christ's atoning death upon the cross for sins; How does the Lord deal with this act of wickedness?  

You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell. (Matt. 5: 27-30)

In this section from Matthew,  we see that the term adultery is used twice. And in the one that follows we have sexual immorality. We have two terms one is more specific in its matter (vs 27); and the other is more general in its matter (vs. 31).  The graphic description in the above statement should not be taken literal; it may simply refer to divorce but in a much more severe manner. And we see this is the case in the statement below:

“It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’  But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Matt. 5: 31-32) 

Marriage between one man and one woman only is to be honoured.  But in the case of Adultery in whatever form it takes the narrow or wide definition, under the new covenant can lead to a breaking of this God given covenant. And this means that Divorce may be a necessary action in order that it does not lead to further problems. This sin is warn against in so many places in the New Testament that it cannot be ignored or pushed aside for the sake of someone wanting to fulfil their own sinful desires. Think of what Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 5:1-13 about the Man's Son and the man's father's wife who are committing an incestuous  act of adultery. And what Paul says in this regard: "It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that is not tolerated even among pagans, for a man has his father's wife." (vs. 1) And he says of the congregation that they are arrogant in not dealing with this by means of excommunication of the man.